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Beiträge, die mit humor getaggt sind


 

‘T. Rex May Be Smaller Than Previously Thought,’ Report 50-Foot-Tall Researchers


LAWRENCE, KS—Saying they hoped their fresh analysis of fossil evidence would help shed new light on the long-extinct theropod, 50-foot-tall paleontologists from the University of Kansas announced Friday that Tyrannosaurus rex might have been smaller than previously thought. “For decades, scientists have held that T.… Read more...

Read more at: https://www.theonion.com/t-rex-may-be-smaller-than-previously-thought-report-1832828723

#humor #satire #news #... mehr anzeigen


 

PlayStation CEO Predicts ‘Post-Console’ World


Sony Interactive boss Shawn Layden predicted a future in which all consoles are united as one, saying that the Nintendo Switch, PlayStation 4, and Xbox One all offer “great experiences.” What do you think? Read more...

Read more at: https://www.theonion.com/playstation-ceo-predicts-post-console-world-1832828491

#humor #satire #news #theonion


 

Trump Demands William Barr Prove Loyalty By Putting Gun In Mouth, Pulling Trigger


WASHINGTON—Saying it was the only way to really know whether he could trust his new attorney general, President Trump loaded a single bullet into a .357 Magnum revolver and demanded William Barr prove his loyalty by putting the barrel in his mouth and pulling the trigger, White House sources confirmed Friday. “If… Read more...

Read more at: https://politics.theonion.com/trump-demands-william-barr-prove-loyalty-by-putting-gun-1832816704

#humor #satire #news #... mehr anzeigen


 

Dog Can’t Believe Owner Left On Fucking MSNBC To Keep It Company While She At Work


OKLAHOMA CITY—Expressing outrage at the obnoxious programming he’d be forced to sit through for the next several hours, local dog Tuffy reportedly couldn’t believe his owner had left the television tuned to fucking MSNBC Thursday to keep him company while she was working. “Jesus Christ, how does she expect me to watch… Read more...

Read more at: https://local.theonion.com/dog-can-t-believe-owner-left-on-fucking-msnbc-to-keep-i-1832791796

#humor #satire #news #... mehr anzeigen


 

Pope Francis Offers Molested Kids 10% Off At Vatican City Gift Shop


VATICAN CITY—In a gesture of goodwill intended to show the Papacy’s support for victims, Pope Francis announced Thursday that children who have been sexually abused by Catholic clergy would receive 10 percent off at the Vatican City gift shop. “While we will never be able to completely undo the damage that was done,… Read more...

Read more at: https://www.theonion.com/pope-francis-offers-molested-kids-10-off-at-vatican-ci-1832792131

#humor #satire #news #... mehr anzeigen


 
#fun #witz #blondine #humor
Eine Blondine beschließt, ihr altes Auto zu verkaufen. Schwierig, da der Tacho bereits 250.000 km aufweist.
Nach längerem Überlegen beschließt sie, ihre Freundin um Rat zu bitten.
Ihre Freundin (eine Brünette) sagt ihr:
"Bist du bereit, etwas Illegales zu tun?"
"Ja, ich muss das Auto auf alle Fälle loswerden."
"Also bring es zu meinem Freund Tony, der ist Automechaniker, er wird dir den Tacho auf 50.000 km herabschrauben."
Die Blondine geht gleich am nächsten Tag zu Tony, der ihr sofort den Tacho umstellt.
Einige Tage später trifft die Brünette wieder auf die Blondine und fragt sie:
"Na, hast du dein Auto verkauft?"
"Bist du wahnsinnig? Jetzt mit 50.000km behalte ich es!"


 

Sweating CornNuts VP Stammers Way Through Pitch For ‘Nutsarito’ At Taco Bell


IRVINE, CA—Realizing his entire presentation deck consisted of little more than the proposed tagline “Twice The Crunch And Twice The Munch,” perspiring CornNuts vice president of marketing Jim Ralston was observed Thursday stammering his way through a pitch for a potential new Taco Bell menu item he termed the… Read more...

Read more at: https://www.theonion.com/sweating-cornnuts-vp-stammers-way-through-pitch-for-nu-1832794262

#humor #satire #news #... mehr anzeigen


 

Unclear Why Stagehand Wrote Heartfelt Little Notes To Everyone In Cast


LEANDER, TX—Following delivery of the sealed, handwritten letters to every member of the cast, it reportedly remained unclear Thursday why stagehand Kirk Weiland had composed heartfelt little notes to all the actors who appeared in the Leander Playhouse’s staging of The Sound Of Music . “I think I was introduced to him… Read more...

Read more at: https://local.theonion.com/unclear-why-stagehand-wrote-heartfelt-little-notes-to-e-1832796319

#humor #satire #news #... mehr anzeigen


 
Bild/Foto

Remember Kids : No Face, No Case !

PS : Nobody cared who I was until I put on the mask - Bane


#shitposting #anarchist meme for cool people
#humor #activism #militant #case #justice #police
#tips #anarchism #black-block #women #hair

I post every day meme about anarchy and other cool stuff.
Feel free to download and/or share them ! 😀


 

Mueller Admits A Smarter President Would’ve Totally Found Way To Stop Investigation By Now


WASHINGTON—In response to President Donald Trump’s continued attacks against the legitimacy of his probe into 2016 election interference, Special Counsel Robert Mueller admitted Thursday that a smarter president would have totally found a way to stop the investigation by now. “Listen, my investigation has been going… Read more...

Read more at: https://politics.theonion.com/mueller-admits-a-smarter-president-would-ve-totally-fou-1832790637

#humor #satire #news #... mehr anzeigen


 
Bild/Foto

Remember Kids : No Face, No Case !

PS : Nobody cared who I was until I put on the mask - Bane


#shitposting #anarchist meme for cool people
#humor #activism #militant #case #justice #police
#tips #anarchism #black-block #women #hair

I post every day meme about anarchy and other cool stuff.
Feel free to download and/or share them ! 😀